10 (Chronological) Signs You Have Monday Disorientation

Butch is a little disoriented...

Butch is a little disoriented…

1. You sleep through your alarm
2. Your cats hurl themselves at your bedroom door in disgust
3. You get shampoo in your eyes
4. You knock the conditioner off the shelf in your shampoo-induced blindness and it lands on your (bad) foot
5. Your phone chargers are still packed, so both phones are dead
6. Those pesky car keys are nowhere to be found
7. You forget your vitamins and have to go back in the house to get them
8. You walk away from your car leaving the windows open
9. You drop your brief bag and the contents spill out onto the pavement
10. You hit the emergency button in the elevator and have to wait embarrassed to tell the operator that you are not in fact stuck, just disoriented, and mumble a rushed apology

About Tristan Higgins, aka Butch Jaxon

I am a butch. This blog is about what I think. If you do not know what butch means, you are probably on the wrong blog. In the interests of inclusion, though, I can tell you that “butch” means a lesbian that is big, strong, tough, more macho, less girly. Of course, there are no hard and fast rules – which is an ongoing theme in my blog (and in the comments), but those are the basics. A butch will most likely not wear makeup. A butch is often referred to as “sir” by someone who is not paying attention. What else? I am, after all, not just a butch. I am happily married to the most amazing woman ever, and the mother of two fantastic kids. I am also a lover of, in no particular order, beer, bowties, breasts, movies, hiking, bookstores, travel, dogs, geocaching, polar bears, the gym, music, gadgets, and more. By day, I am an intrepid corporate entertainment lawyer. Although I try hard not to be labeled as such – sporting a bleached Mohawk, for example. Think more entertainment and less corporate. By night, bring it all on! In my blog, I talk about things from a butch perspective, but this is not just for butches. We all love our femmes. Please do not let me offend femmes, mine in particular! If you like what you read here, I hope you will comment and let me know what you think. If you do not like what you read, well, what the hell do I care? Start your own blog. Be Butch. View all posts by Tristan Higgins, aka Butch Jaxon

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